Jesus, a new flat and a pretentious deer.

Last Thursday Emma and Rob had a party at their flat to celebrate Emma moving in, to catch up and oh and something to do with Jesus. It is the most beautiful flat I have seen in a long time and I may have to leave Lindsay and kill Emma so I can have Rob and his flat all to myself. :)

It was all a very lovely evening filled with laughter, dancing and of course serious discussions about world politics until the evil Polish vodka. Now of course it says on the bottle that it is just regular old vodka and that the long stem of grass is purely for decorative purposes. I personally feel that this "grass" may actually be the hair of Satan. Needless to say after a few too many cocktails and two to three shots of Satan's vodka I was legless. Literally. One minute I was getting up from the couch and making my way across the living room and the next I was on the floor. No tripping or slipping just up then down. The lovely Kalen picked me up off the floor and got me to Sarah.

I spent the next couple of hours admiring the craftsmanship of Rob and Emma's Bemis toilet. I have to say to the people of Bemis, love your work, however though the push in toilet flush may seem very stylish and sleek but it can be a bit of a pain to a drunken woman trying to hold on to the shred of dignity she has remaining. Of course Sarah was wonderful and went above and beyond best friend duties that night. She is the Lilly Allen to my Lindsay Lohan. Sarah did not however get along quite as well with the porcelain deer on Emma's bathroom sink. She announced that the deer was judging her and then promptly removed it's head. I cannot comment on the deer and it's alleged judging as I was too busy trying to stay alive.

Moments before I fell down for no reason

After slamming down water and triskets while taking advice from Sarah on the best ways to "remove" everything from my stomach and Emma pounding my back and offering crispers (among other things) Sarah managed to crawl me to the spare bedroom. I slept it off a bit and then managed to walk back out into the now just as messy as I had been party. All around an excellent evening...watch for future tabloid articles announcing my admittance to a Malibu rehab facility.